To Be Married? or To Be In Love?


A topic I was asked to speak about is being married vs. being in LOVE.

First off let me start off with saying my family is West Indian. This may not be applicable to all West Indian homes but I believe there is some validity in what I’m about to speak about.

With that being said, there are high expectations for their children. Education, Career and Marriage are at the top of the list and in that order. But what about the LOVE? That’s an element that’s not really pushed. You see a man, you guys are dating, shortly after he is expected to put a ring on it. But what if he is not the one? And God forbid you and this gentlemen get real busy on night which leads to an unexpected pregnancy. Telling your West Indian parent will be one of the hardest things you will have to do. Questions of marriage will surely arise and the pressure will be on to tie the knot.

Will the relationship have a chance to last? When do we begin to find LOVE in this relationship? Have we become just a business arrangement? Is it easier for your West Indian parents explain to your other family members and friends there is now a union that exists? But then we are missing the whole point of what it is to Love and be in LOVE.

I don’t want to be rushed into marriage nor into LOVE. I want a LOVE that is natural and pure that grows over time. Society has made it so hard for us to even see marriage in an honest light. The marriage becomes terminated before it even begins and now you’re left with dealing with lawyers, paperwork and filing for divorce. You and your once “husband” are no longer on speaking terms and you have to explain to your child why “daddy” is no longer living at home.

Marriage should be treated the same way as LOVE: It’s Forever. Do not go into a situation trying to appease your family or friends. For you will always end up last and will spend countless years full of regret, resentment and heartbreak. Choose your LOVE carefully and it will yield a fruitful Marriage one day. ❤️

5 thoughts on “To Be Married? or To Be In Love?

  1. Geri A-Major says:

    I know about this subject VERY WELL. Thank You MoonChild for touching on all these sensitive topics. Damn West Indian Parents know how to push education, career, and marriage….but never touch on Love at all. I believe that you have to have LOVE in your heart, and be willing accept the love and pass it forward, and the real love that you seek for..will FIND YOU, when you least expect it.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Coming from a west indian back ground myself. Marriage isn’t even really an option until later in life. A conversation had with my mom i was told that if i had children married before 30 i will not get my inheritance. When i asked what if i was in love and married her said that love doesn’t grantee anything

    Liked by 1 person

    • MoonChild19 says:

      Wow that’s crazy! Your inheritance! Thank you for sharing! I love my west indian background for it has shaped me to be the person I am but they are a piece of work.. Lol.. Thank you for reading!


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